Us Weekly Delivers Breaking News

In a moment of boredom at work (shocking, I know!) I decided to start perusing my favorite websites (UsWeekly, People, DListed) to see what’s going on in the world (or the world of celebrities and celebrity wanna-bes) and I run across this headline:

Ouch! Channing Tatum Severely Burns His Penis

At first glance, I got excited because I think Channing Tatum is a total hottie and I’m hoping this headline is accompanied by a picture. After reading the entire headline I find myself befuddled, disgusted and a little curious but still kinda hopeful there may be a picture. I know the curiosity must be killing you so here is the whole story:

"Channing Tatum Is Proud of His Package," declares the February issue of Details.
And he should be.
In the issue, the actor, 29, opens up about surviving a painful accident that caused severe burns to his penis.
He had been shooting the drama The Eagle of the Ninth last October in the freezing cold Scottish Highlands.
"The only way to keep warm was by pouring a mix of boiling water and river water down your suit," Tatum, 29, tells the magazine. "We were finally done shooting for the day, and one of the crew guys asks if I want to warm up before I go. I'm like, Nah, I'm good. And then I thought, Why not?
"Thing is, he'd forgotten to dilute the kettle water," he continues. "So he poured scalding water down my suit. And I was trying to pull the suit away from my body to somehow get away from the boiling water, and the more I pulled the suit away, the lower the water went. It just went straight down and pretty much burned the skin off the head of my dick."
He was rushed to the nearest hospital -- an hour away. On the way, however, the ice pack he was applying to the burn lost its chill.
"I said to the driver, who was ex-special-forces Marines, 'You might have to knock me out, because I don't know if I can take the pain. Just grab something and hit me on the back of my head,'" he recalls.
Morphine eventually did the trick, he says, but it was still embarrassing.
"I had five guys looking at my shriveled, burned penis," he says.
Looking back, he says, "It was the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life."
Rest assured, "I'm good . . . now," says Tatum, a former stripper. "Now my penis is fantastic! One hundred percent recovered. Put me back in the game, Coach."

I really dont have any commentary on this story, just thought that this should be shared.